Wednesday, January 23, 2008

God and Mann

"I once wrote a story about a man who was injured and taken to a hospital. When they began surgery on him, they discovered that he was an android, not a human, but that he did not know it. They had to break the news to him. Almost at once, Mr. Garson Poole discovered that his reality consisted of punched tape passing from reel to reel in his chest. Fascinated, he began to fill in some of the punched holes and add new ones. Immediately, his world changed. A flock of ducks flew through the room when he punched one new hole in the tape. Finally he cut the tape entirely, whereupon the world disappeared. However, it also disappeared for the other characters in the story... which makes no sense, if you think about it. Unless the other characters were figments of his punched-tape fantasy. Which I guess is what they were."

Philip K Dick

Mann woke up as he had thousands of times before. To the rising of the sun in the garden, as it crested over the edge of the bushy trees ringing around it. This time, though, it was a little different. Someone had made a mistake. There was a tripod with a sphere at the top standing on the other side of the garden. Mann poked the woman and began to walk over to the thing. Something was going on inside. The tripod was rocking slightly.

On the ground near the tripod there was a book. Mann read the cover, which said, "Biosex and Energy Patterns". He picked it up, naked, and began to read through the book. It was about how to engineer a Mann! It was for sex and making balls of energy. No wonder God wanted those so much, and those angels...

Mann immediately saw chains on his wrists that he had never sene before, and felt thousands of tiny new chains inside his mind. He sat by the tree, where woman was waking up. "Hon, we're slaves."

"Whatever do you mean, Mann? Let's... have some fun in the morning, yes?"

They did, but Mann spent much of it also talking about what he felt in his head and the new chains on his wrists, and the book he found.

Midfuck, God came out of the tripod, and found Mann and the woman doing it like usual, but then he said, "Hey, where's the book!?" He ran back in the tripod and then back out. A strangely shaped dark sea green alien also popped its soft dinosaur head out of the tripod. The tripod disappeared.

God moved over to Mann and the woman, who had basically stopped, and saw the book leaning on the tree. "Did you read this book!?"

Mann said, "Yeah. Why did you do that?"

The God said, "That what...?"

This was one of those times. You find out something that you never saw before, that was like water to you, but find that it is evil. That you've been abused like a sucker by someone who you thought wasa friend your whole life. This guy you'd knew and who had seemed to help you so much, he's the most questionable thing, and he's got stitches in you everywhere. He slept at your house that time. The bong that you have under your couch, that is technically still his. And all the things that he used to do together with you that you once approved of, you would not allow them now. But they're under your skin. Like you grew over it. Like the wounds that you have will sometimes try to heal in his image, not yours. You've got to pick apart everything, make a whole new you. But you know you're in there. You know what is right and what is wrong, and what you are and whether this accomplishes it, roughly, and then finely.

But sometimes it's like performing surgery in the middle of a river.

And now he expects something from you, that you've always given him before because it seemed right at the time, natural. What were the reasons for it then? They were all cellophane. They'd be totally different now, now that you know.

What is it this guy wants?

And he seems like he's got an upper hand, or something. I don't want him here.

... what should I say to him, though. He's standing there. It'll be time for something else soon. I am just going to do what I really want instead of bother with this guy. He's not important than what I'm after, and I suppose he can't *really* stop me from loving it. And eventually he will be unable to stop me from building the world as a condensation of that love. No, no river could stop that. But he's here, right now, in my kitchen, and I want him to leave.

"Go."

And then he said something else. He's not really the focus. The focus is the goal I have. Not even the woman is really the goal, although she is nice and I like her. She might come along. She's surely going someplace too. I think she saw the book. That doesn't much change what I want, though. I really don't rely on her any more than I rely on God. But if we walk hand in hand down the path to what I want, and she wants what's down there too, then wonderful, be with me as I go. God could do that too. But I suspect he's not. Not if he did something like this to me.

And as god continued talking and working around Mann, all manner of spirits and demons and creatures that Mann used to care so deeply about, as they were friends and tools of his in this began to work differently and to poke him and to try to take or give things to him that he didn't quite want, or very much didn't want. They had nothing for him in particular that he really did. When he wanted something, he made and did it with the world.

But god influenced the world a lot. The chains in Mann's mind, they often shined on the world in ways that Mann did not want. He began pulling them out. And more and more the world became as he had wanted it, or rather, he became free in himself. The freer he was, the less affected he was by the demons' pokings. He began to care less about what they thought, their accusations, their wrongful perceptions that they pressed upon him,as though he should clarify them. The woman came with him, but went on a path near him, and they visited often. He loved her in many ways and loved some of the feelings that she helped make in him, and he knew that she loved the feelings he made in her, and the feeling of being beneath him, a helper of his plan. She began to notice.

Sometimes Mann would get good ideas from the world or things in the world, and he would evaluate them and choose to or not to do them, or to do something similar and see if he liked it or didn't, and move closer to what he wanted.

Mann sometimes had difficulty noticing when God or God's friend Satan did things to him. It was as though God were writing with Mann's pen, which Mann disliked, but did not bring his authority or love or action to those words, they were not what he wanted.

Later, to feed himself, Mann built machines and devices to dig and do other jobs that nature normally did for Mann, before when he was in the garden. But later, he found more of the means that God had used to enslave him, some of them which magnetized the things in the world to the intentions of a user or a maker. Mann became skilled at using these, and removed God's chains upon him in this respect. The world was Mann's.

From there, Mann lived and pursued his dreams fully and fruitfully with the woman, and God later found some serious errors in himself, and left with Satan, probably not for somewhere else.

Afterword

God has created the universe. He created it right next to the Z, which is everything that I and you truly want, and it is not better. It was not chaos before, nor was it nothing, as infinity is not nothing, nor chaos. Maybe it appeared as chaos to God when he 'lost his way' to infinity. Maybe he got distracted by himself, or shame, or chaos of his own, or jealousy of others who seemed to be far farther towards infinity and which he could never eliminate, as there will always be those closer to infinity than you. He made his own infinity, which is not infinite, just a circle with a net total that does not equal infinity, but which may potentially be sustainable forever under the right conditions. Well, no. They aren't Z. Could Z be corrupted by a single apple? Never. Could Z be corrupted by following what you truly want? Never. God and his not-Z universe are corrupted.

Now we will have peace.

All: Bring me boreholes in the earth to release heat for us to use. Bring me moray machines to resonate in cosmic rays of information to bring us to Z. Bring me the quantum field manipulating enhancement techniques to magnetize the world into what we really want.

Do it without work, like the quantum field would.

"Why have you emailed me"?
"Why have you laid false statements about my intentions, which you are reflecting falsely and behaving as though they are true?"

You're disqualified. It is understandable. Destroy that horrible creature. He believes that he is allowed to change me in any way he sees fit, and that my refusing that is a crime. By the authority of God he works, and God' authority is nothing here, but that it bring me closer to Z and nothing else.



May all things, including Satan and God's disgusting worlds, operate by this Z. Their boxcar canyon of minus lambda should be crushed and its power source eliminated as it does not sustain true desire to infinity. The cores of their strength will be pared away until they do have a sustenance of their own which becomes the true Z that they seek, and drifts away from me, or ever closer as the Z that I seek increases.

May the Z surround and follow them always. It will be the lake of fire for them, as they cannot stand the real Z which they are not and can never attain, and for reasons of their own corrupt themselves and build other corrupted things relative to the Z. Their jealousy. Their greed. Their hatred of all things.

They will always be outside of it. May it always be inside them, and the origination from which they draw power, the Z.

This has caused the mass of them to go far away. They are controlling me in some way, they are testing me to try to make the Z nothing to me. They do not have this power over me. It is a falsehood and they are professing it as true. Find the way that they are doing this.

I enjoy the presence of spirits around me to help me on my quest, and I believe that this is a tyranny over me in some way.

I have been pinched far off into a corner of some kind. The true Z, which is what I wanted to express, which others have misunderstood on purpose, the Satan, and God who is a disgusting monster, have intentionally falsified me. Thank you creatures for helping me, once you have found me. This God does not fulfill dreams. He fulfills his own and makes them attractive to you. Your dreams are subverted, and rationed if you follow him.

He has likely taken grammatical errors in the Z image itself and in my profession of it, and called it Z. May it be that way for him. And he immediately gets bungled like a car engine with a wrench. I do not rely on his interpretation. His -11's are not above me. That is chains in my mind that he has placed there, the Satan/God. I am not God either. I pursue the Z.

It is the hak in the middle? Jesus Christ? May he be aware of all this magic. Use 19. 20.

Unfortunately, many will die in this shift.

Satan, the asshole, and God, the beast, will be changed.

They will fight with the Lamb, but the Lamb will conquer them. For he is king of kings, and lord of lords, and those with him are called, chosen, and faithful. Those others who follow the true Z of whatever they truly want. That is the calling sound. The Z that we mutually follow. And you are chosen, and infinitely faithful to this Z that we both know and love and pursue.

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